At the beginning of the emergence of a problem with poor communication in a relationship, this can be perceived as a minor problem that would be resolved on its own. But, if it isn’t resolved in time, everything can worsen, because of which the relationship can completely collapse. In the article, we decided to tell you how it works for a couple, as well as how to work on communication in a relationship so that you again feel great next to your partner.
In fact, bad communication in a relationship can negatively affect any relationship. And it doesn’t even matter how well you interact with each other, it can change the situation drastically. When you just begin to understand that something is wrong, it may seem like just a “black line” between you and not give it any sense. But if this is left like that, then, in the end, even greater conflicts, quarrels may begin, and the desire to do something for the partner would gradually fade away.
This would be that point when there is no communication in a relationship, you no longer speak heart to heart and don’t laugh, but only hear pretensions and speak in a raised tone. Hardly anyone wants to be in such a toxic relationship, right? It is precisely at such moments that couples can break up if they don’t have the desire and understanding of how to rebuild communication in a relationship.
But here everything isn’t as bad as you might think. Even under the most difficult conditions, there is a way out. Precisely to prevent this from happening, it is worth considering how to fix communication at the initial stage, when there is nothing critical. So let’s find out what kind of situation you have.
Let’s look at some signals when communication fails in a relationship:
If you have already noticed 1-2 or more signs in your relationship, this may mean the emergence of a problem of lack of communication in a relationship. In this case, try to find a solution to the problem as soon as possible, so that your relationship becomes stronger and questions about what to do when you can’t communicate with your partner could no longer bother you.
But if you see that you have all the signs, then most likely the two of you would struggle with this for a long time. So we will recommend signing up with a family psychologist who can already help you work on how to have good communication in a relationship.
Now is the time to learn how to be a better communicator in a relationship. These are the chips that always work, so take them as a basis for restoring communication:
Alas, few people want to discuss any problems or other issues regarding the relationship. In addition, not everyone can, seeing their partner, not in the best mood, come up and ask, because they hope that they would be told everything earlier. But alas, this doesn’t always work out, and as a result, there may be concealment of urgent problems.
Such problems at one point can simply spill out right away with a small quarrel. We think some of you have come across this. In this case, if you want to understand how to fix the lack of communication, you shouldn’t switch to raised tones, but just sit down and have a heart-to-heart talk. To make it easier for you, make a suitable calm environment, have tea with condiments, or some wine. This would turn a heated squabble into a calm conversation.
Many people understand how much they want, after the ardor of the quarrel has passed, to hug, give rest to tense nerves and calmly forget about what caused the conflict until the next similar one occurs. Don’t make this common mistake in your relationship! Yes, give yourself time, calm down, make peace, but then return to the analysis of the reasons for the conflict.
But don’t get attached to the temporary exhilaration caused by the truce. Now you want to act, but soon your ardor will pass. In order not to give up and not return to ignoring the problem. Discuss as concretely as possible each other’s actions to resolve conflict and combat not communicating in a relationship. When would you start these steps? What would these actions be? What approximate time frames for overcoming the problem do you see?
If any of you are constantly losing your temper and being overly emotional, start practicing practices that help balance your emotions, such as yoga or meditation.
In the midst of a conflict, when partners exchange accusations and claim no one is listening to anyone. Each of the parties to the conflict is in a state of attack or defense, but not perception and understanding. Our psyche is arranged in such a way that we, first, try to defend ourselves from criticism, to find contradictions in it, to find the most convincing refutation, or respond to it with criticism. The problem is that we don’t always think about how it is, we don’t see the truth, obeying an ancient psychic mechanism. And we think that since it seems to us that we are right, it means that we are right.
Try to change these familiar patterns and instead of immediately looking for another counter-argument in a quarrel, think about how thorough the criticism addressed to you is? Try to distract yourself from your resentment and irritation. Don’t let your offended Ego run ahead of you like a man stung by a bee.
It just so happens that we gradually get used to the merits of our other half. They become a given for us, and we basically begin to notice flaws. These disadvantages are seen especially clearly in comparison with other pairs. After a few years, as you are together, you may have questions in your head “do I need this relationship with this person?”. This is a normal reaction if you have been dating for a long time, but it is still not one of the most pleasant reactions and can lead to a lack of communication in relationships, or a breakup altogether.
Try not to constantly compare your partner to others. Try to think about what is good about him, how you are like him, instead of thinking only about the bad. Imagine these virtues in your mind and mentally thank the person for having them. And remember, looking for positive aspects in another person doesn’t mean accepting his shortcomings. Try to help him correct the shortcomings. But it isn’t necessary only for them to compose the appearance of a person.
Understand that there are no “taboo” topics in a relationship. If you are tormented by doubts, fears, insecurity, talk about this to your partner. Let him know what you dislike about your relationship, listen to what he is experiencing discomfort and displeasure. Discuss it and come to a compromise, this is what becomes a big step towards solving how to fix a communication problem in a relationship. Remember that sensitive issues like sex should also be discussed because this is also part of the relationship.
Of course, you shouldn’t try to forcibly find out all the secrets of your spouse, but yourself to reveal all your past secrets. This also needs to be balanced, as well as everything else concerning your relationship.
It would be a big mistake to think that the relationship will develop on its own, as soon as you start. Relationships require constant attention, the involvement of both partners. Development implies not only the strengthening of communication, for example, the decision to live together, marriage, the birth of children, but also the personal development of each partner.
The ability to find a compromise, to listen to another person is a skill that needs to be developed. From my reasoning, it might seem that a relationship is some kind of prison that calls on a person to give up what is dear to him for his precious personality. But this is not the case. The development of compassion, empathy, the ability to say “no” to thousands of your “want” actually lead to freedom. Freedom from your selfish desires, your Ego, which commands us. And altruism is not rigid self-restraint, it is an attempt to free oneself from anger, indulging one’s weaknesses, stubbornness, fixation on oneself for the sake of joint happiness.
Keep in mind that each of all these details is undoubtedly important, so you shouldn’t decide which one and choose it. The best option for how to deal with no communication in a relationship is to use a little bit of all of them so you can get used to the new foundations of good communication between you. It is only when you start putting these things into practice that you would see that the improvements start from the very first few times you do it. And if so, then you can soon decide how to fix communication problems.
It is also worth noting that you shouldn’t stop doing these things after everything falls into place. Tips would help maintain a stable level of communication, and conflicts would bother you less and less. Well, now you can figure out how to fix bad communication in a relationship thanks to our tips. We recommend that you gradually start to show this in the direction of your partner, but first, talk honestly about what you two need from each other, and then start working on yourself. We are sure that the two of you would be able to resolve the issue of no communication in relationships. The main thing is that you both want this, and then the result won’t be long in coming. Just get started!
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